30-Day Blog Challenge: Day 5 - A Letter to My Dreams

Since I was a child, I've been living with extremely vivid dreams. Its a rare occurence when I dream and am gently awakened by it. My dreams, when I have them, are extremely vivid and rock me awake with ferocity. I also had so many dreams for my life that I had not yet fulfilled. I write this letter to both types.

Dear Nighttime Dreams,

Many nights I pray for respite from your intensity. Waking up in a state of panic, a cold sweat or a fever is nothing I look forward to. The images you present to me scare me, make me joyful, or arouse me. I can never tell which. The thoughts of my mind before rest rarely have anything to do with the show you put on. I know that sometimes my mind is in overdrive, making it difficult for you to piece together a coherent lesson. I still lie down in fear that you will return to me. My 10,000 Dreams Explained helps me piece together some sort of meaning in all of this. Some sort of connection to reality when things seem so far away. Sometimes I wish that I could understand them all better. That I could find some semblance of normalcy in the picture show of my mind. The nights I am without you give me peaceful rest. I yearn for that rest, and curse myself when you deprive me of them. Sometimes I appreciate the insight you provide, while other times I wish for you to stay away...

Trying to find rest,
Lexi

To my Lifelong Dreams,

I know that you must think I have forgotten you all. I know that you may think I have abandoned you for others. I must admit that life got in the way of achieving some of you, but I work constantly to try to figure out how to make you all happen again. I want nothing more than to achieve all of the things I so desparately wanted in life. The train to my destiny has not been derailed, we are sitting at a fork in the tracks deciding which route is best. I will begin my journey with a renewed sense of self and hope for the future. Hoping that those who I carry on this train will provide the support and encouragement I will need to stay on track. I will reach you all one day. Do not fret. I am on my way.

See you soon,

Lexi