30 Day Blog Challenge: Day 14 - Someone you’ve drifted away from

Well, well, well. There are actually a few people, so I'll write to a couple folks.

Dear Johnny,
Since you commented on my facebook for the first time in who knows how long, I'll start with you. I've known you almost forever, and one thing you've always been is a shoulder to lean on. No matter what I called you for or talked to you about, you always wanted to make sure I was ok before you left or hung up. You gave me real advice on life and for that I appreciate you. I am so proud that you went back to school, and wish you nothing but success. I remember talking to you a lot when you were away in the Air Force. Why the government paid you to protect us, I will never know. LOL. But even when we have a falling out, I thank you for being who you have been in my life.

Thanks so much,
Lexi

Dear Chris,
I know that the last few years have been hectic. I mean, you had a beautiful baby girl (despite my shock that you're someone's dad lol), graduated from grad school, and are out here doing your thing. I miss coming by to listen to music, or you make beats. Play some cards and listen to all of Bean's drama lol. Just chillout. I love you for listening to me whine and cry over whatever guy it was that year, and giving me the straight, no chaser truth. Yeah, sometimes I resisted, but believe that I was listening. We gotta make some time soon to laugh, talk smack and reminisce. The numbers the same as it was a decade ago. So hit me up!
Kan't Stand Your Krazy K's habit,
Lexi

30 Day Blog Challenge: Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you

I was awake anyway since people kept texting and facebook messaging me, so I'm knocking out a few of these tonight.

This one is a hard one for me. I can't think of a single person that I wish could forgive me. I thought for almost 15 minutes and nothing. So...I'll revisit this one if I can think of someone.

Until then...
Lexi

30 Day Blog Challenge: Day 12 - The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain

Dear Kenny,

I don't hate you. I probably should and would have more than enough reasons to. But I dont. You caused me a lot of heartache and pain. I spent nearly 4 years trying to understand who and what you were. Was it the sweet guy who cleaned my place and cuddled so close to me at night? Or could it be that you're the lying, cheating, manipulator, fronting for your friends behind my back and disrespecting me? Finally being fed up and walking away was the best thing I could have done for myself. I spent the best part of my 20's confused, hurt, happy one minute and in tears the next. And I couldnt tear myself away. Not until the day you pushed me. The day you decided to put your hands on me in anger. My GG always taught me if they'll do it once, they'll do it again. That was the beginning of the end. I didnt hesitate when I filed the order of protection. It gave me the space I needed to detach. To move on and forget you. Despite your pleas to the contrary.

It almost gave me a laugh to hear you tell me I need to move myself and my son to California, YEARS after I left you alone, as if I'd even consider such a foolish request. Or was that another lie? Another manipulation from someone who couldnt tell the truth if you paid them to. Either way Kenny, as I write this blog, I feel no anger. I feel no sadness, no hostility, no...nothing. And thats how I know I am over you. How I know that no matter where my life takes me, in your arms is not an option. To think I loved you so deeply. Someone I'd known since I was a child. They say the ones closest to you will hurt you the most. And that, you most certainly proved.

Goodbye forever,
Lexi