30 Day Blog Challenge: Day 12 - The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain

Dear Kenny,

I don't hate you. I probably should and would have more than enough reasons to. But I dont. You caused me a lot of heartache and pain. I spent nearly 4 years trying to understand who and what you were. Was it the sweet guy who cleaned my place and cuddled so close to me at night? Or could it be that you're the lying, cheating, manipulator, fronting for your friends behind my back and disrespecting me? Finally being fed up and walking away was the best thing I could have done for myself. I spent the best part of my 20's confused, hurt, happy one minute and in tears the next. And I couldnt tear myself away. Not until the day you pushed me. The day you decided to put your hands on me in anger. My GG always taught me if they'll do it once, they'll do it again. That was the beginning of the end. I didnt hesitate when I filed the order of protection. It gave me the space I needed to detach. To move on and forget you. Despite your pleas to the contrary.

It almost gave me a laugh to hear you tell me I need to move myself and my son to California, YEARS after I left you alone, as if I'd even consider such a foolish request. Or was that another lie? Another manipulation from someone who couldnt tell the truth if you paid them to. Either way Kenny, as I write this blog, I feel no anger. I feel no sadness, no hostility, no...nothing. And thats how I know I am over you. How I know that no matter where my life takes me, in your arms is not an option. To think I loved you so deeply. Someone I'd known since I was a child. They say the ones closest to you will hurt you the most. And that, you most certainly proved.

Goodbye forever,
Lexi